Sphere Theory: Kotler meets Darwin

In the world of personal development, socializing plays a fundamental role, nothing new. Its importance lies not only in the building of the society integration skills - even if you think of yourself as a rebel fighting capitalism! and society!, it is likely that you are finding strength in an also rebellious group! but also as a key part of who you are.

Personally, all social gatherings are but a public plateau where personality traits go down the unconscious catwalk before you. Like a fashion critic apprentice, you observe, you absorb, you collect whatever traits you find most interesting. And then you make your own show. Of couse, you have to get the approval of your peers...even if you have to try different audiences. But oh well, if it isn't the posh of Milan the beggars of the suburbs will do just fine (these are more likely to buy you a drink!)

If you think I'm talking about the exclusive, mind and stomach revolving world of adolescence, think again! Later on, when an established career gives you many things that money can and does buy for you, you still continue to look for a point-of-difference. Just like a bird that doesn't have any singing abilities seeks refuge in nature's mercyful ways to get a beautiful coloured feather coat, also men and women look for distinctive forms to being pinpointed in the social map.

Now think of this map as a sphere. Think of it as a perceptual map sphere (this is where I believe all sciences intertwine!) that represents how and where people position themselves.. It isn't bi nor tri-dimensional. Theoretically, it should be an extremely complex figure which matrixes all the traits of personality, but we can simplify by grouping them (intelligence vs beauty is the simplest). The way I like to see it, as they watch and learn from others, people simply choose their quadrants according to what they'd like to be known for (more intelligent than the average, not as intelligent but definitely more interesting than the average, funnier than the next guy...etc) and try to be isolated. Its marketing "establishing your point of difference vs competition" together with "nature's survival skills", basically...Kotler meets Darwin!

But there's more: because it is a sphere involving an enourmous amount of attributes (x-dimensional, with x the number of attributes), there is more than enough room for differentiation, the combinations are a plenty. And being a sphere means that there are no rights and wrongs in your choice. Because you simply choose where you want to stand. Because others will look at you according to their preferred attributes, on what they feel is important; someone that rates highly intelligence rather than physical look or wityness is more likely to get along with someone he reckons stands on that same area.

So what starts as defining your stronger traits is what keeps defining the main line in your relationships and social dealings.

Ahh…Now THAT’S what I call a good mental masturbation!

Have a nice weekend...as I'm off to the snowy lands of Andorra!